Lawd even reading the title makes me nervous! Alright y’all! I’m about to keep it alllllllll the way real today 🤣 It is no secret I’ve been married 12 going on 13 years this year. Marriage is one of the things I’m extremely passionate about, so whenever I can I’m always trying to share things I’ve learned along this journey!  A few weeks ago I did a Q&A Session with my Instagram family! One of the questions was what are the keys to a successful marriage ? My response was Jesus, a healthy sex life and healthy communication! The responses were flying in about a healthy sex life! So I said let me speak on it 🤣 Once I learned just how important it was to maintain a healthy sex life my marriage changed👌🏾🔥💃🏽 Which by the way sounds simple cause who doesn’t love sex with their spouse right ?! 🤣😂 LMBO! But let’s be real y’all! When life happens, you have 100 kids 🤣, your 100 kids have 18 different extracurricular activities a piece 😩🤣, you have a demanding career or your an entrepreneur with a booming business the struggle to maintain a healthy sex life is REAL! So I wanted to share how we stay very healthy over here 😂🤣

1. I SAY YES! 

I know y’all are thinking girl what ?! But honestly just saying yes to your husbae when they ask can make all the difference! It can be so tempting to say no. Especially if you’ve been up all night with a crying baby, or you worked a 12 hour shift and you are exhausted but saying yes despite your exhaustion makes your husbae feel loved, appreciated and wanted and in return makes him even more attracted to you! For me this is huge cause I absolutely LOVE when Aaron tells me how gorgeous and sexy he thinks I am😩🙌🏾 I mean what wife doesn’t want their husband all over them ?! Saying yes more is a guaranteed way to keep the passion burning 🔥

2. I KEEP MYSELF UP aka SELF-CARE

Who thought as a teenager that when you’d grow up, get married and have kids that just combing your hair would be the hardest part of your day some days! LMBO! 🤣 I’m not goin lie y’all your girl still struggles in the area of getting up and making myself look like something as the old folks say 😂🤣 Y’all see me made up a lot but most days I’m in a bonnet and pajamas chillin’. Aaron actually doesn’t even care for me to be super made up he just wants me to take my bonnet and pajamas off 🤣😂 My saving grace in this area is that I do go to the hair salon, nail salon and get waxed regularly. I’m a HUUUUGGGGEEEE advocate of self-care especially as a momma and a wife because when you feel good and look good you will perform at your highest level of efficiency! (Side Note: I am gonna have to dedicate a whole post to self-care for mommas because I run into so many women who put themselves on the back burner and think that’s ok🙅🏽‍♀️) Ok back to my current post. I have gotten so  much better about getting dressed daily. However I know this is an area that I can continue to work on because Aaron does love when I simply just put on clothes and I mean that’s a simple request y’all 🤣

3. SOMETIMES I HAVE TO PLAN 

If you have to carve out a specific time to have sex, DO THAT. Some people get hung up on planning sex but I’m here to tell you GET OVER IT👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🤣 You have to do what you have to do sometimes. I’ve learned there are seasons in life! When I say seasons I mean, there are times you’ll be heavily working to reach goals and then there are times where you will be able to rest. You need to be able to identify what season you are in. For example, Aaron & I are coming off a season of “resting” and now we are in a “grind” season!  So if we  both know Tuesday at 3:30PM we will both have an open 30 minutes in the day we are planning to be in the bedroom or the nearest area that’s comfortable 🙃🤣 LMBO! I don’t know if that’s TMI but I’m just trying to save some marriages y’all and that requires a certain level of transparency 😩🤣

 

4. I KEEP IT SPICY 🔥 

Ok y’all one of my FAV things to do is send pictures and Marco Polos to Aaron! LMBO 🤣 I will legit get all dressed up or not 👀🙃🤣 and put on a full face of makeup to send him pictures. That’s all I’m gonna say about that cause I’m trying to keep this PG🤣 Y’all better get the point and if you don’t send me an email! LMBO!!!!🤣 My next FAV thing to do is going to bed looking cute and smelling amazing! I buy all the cute pajamas now. I use to just wear big dingy tshirts and basketball shorts to bed. When I realized a cute pair of silk pajamas at Marshall’s was $15 my life was never the same! LMBO! 😂 So once I have showered and put on my pajamas I usually dab a little perfume on and hop in the bed. This will most definitely keep your sex life lit. So much so some days I am tempted to throw on basketball shorts and a hoodie so nothing pops off ! LMBO!🤣

5. I PRAY! 🙏🏾

I know y’all are like huh? 👀 But this is actually the first thing I do when it pertains to keeping my marriage healthy and ESPECIALLY OUR SEX LIFE. My prayer is simple. I say, “God keep Aaron & I stayed on each other. God set a fire so deep in both our souls for each other that it will never burn out.”  Whew! Even saying the prayer out loud makes me just feel a certain way! LMBO 🤣😂Many people don’t realize that prayer can change ALL THINGS, INCLUDING YOUR SEX LIFE WITH YOUR SPOUSE.👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾

Do you have any tips for married couples?! Drop them in my comments below!

Until next time,

Santana❤️

 

 

 

 

 

 

Santana Dillon
I'm a wife & momma to 3 beautiful children based out of Atlanta, GA. I love to blog about all things faith, family & fashion!